I recently read this article, about how we should avoid mentioning appearances when talking to little girls, and instead focus on intellectual conversation to encourage society to value girls' brains instead of their appearances.
Example of what not to say: "Hello little girl. You're as cute as a button!"
Example of what to say: "Hello little girl. What books are you reading?"
I liked the article and thought the author made some interesting points. However, I still don't see the problem with telling a little girl (or any kid for that matter) how adorable they are and also asking what books they're reading. The author of the article points out that girls as young as six are worried about being fat as a result of the emphasis that our society places on their appearance. Maybe kids should be worried about being fat considering the high incidence of childhood obesity in this country. It's sad and unhealthy.
Still, I do see that there is a problem with girls only getting the message that they should be pretty, and not getting the message that they should be smart. I definitely think that's a problem that needs to be addressed, and I've been thinking a lot about how I might be able to help with that in my community (don't be surprised if I blog more on that topic later).
But at the same time, let's not pretend that being physically attractive isn't important as well. It isn't just important in the US; it's important everywhere in the world. It's part of our biology. Every day at work I see people wearing outfits that borderline on pajamas. Nobody is going to listen to you long enough to find out how smart you are if you look like you don't give a sh*t. If you want to be heard, you need to comb your hair and put on some pants that aren't made of flannel. I don't think this is too much to ask.
The other thing that got me thinking about this topic is a TV show called "Toddlers & Tiaras". If you haven't seen it, please let me be the first to tell you that it's f*cking awesome. It's a reality show that follows young children (mostly girls, but sometimes boys) who are competing in pageants. While it's true that most of the parents are overzealous, I think it's great that the kids are involved in a competitive activity that they seem to enjoy. I also think it's great that I get to watch the overzealous parents lose their minds over a fake hair piece being misplaced.
I'd just like to point out that it isn't always the physically "cutest" kid who wins the pageant. The winner is usually the kid who has the best attitude and executes all their routines well. How is that different from any other sport or competitive activity available to kids? I have nothing against teaching kids that hard work and dedication usually pays off. Sometimes you work hard and you still don't win. Is that a bad lesson? I think not.
Bring on the fake teeth and sparkly outfits, and afterward, let's all eat celery and watch Jeopardy.
Example of what not to say: "Hello little girl. You're as cute as a button!"
Example of what to say: "Hello little girl. What books are you reading?"
I liked the article and thought the author made some interesting points. However, I still don't see the problem with telling a little girl (or any kid for that matter) how adorable they are and also asking what books they're reading. The author of the article points out that girls as young as six are worried about being fat as a result of the emphasis that our society places on their appearance. Maybe kids should be worried about being fat considering the high incidence of childhood obesity in this country. It's sad and unhealthy.
Still, I do see that there is a problem with girls only getting the message that they should be pretty, and not getting the message that they should be smart. I definitely think that's a problem that needs to be addressed, and I've been thinking a lot about how I might be able to help with that in my community (don't be surprised if I blog more on that topic later).
But at the same time, let's not pretend that being physically attractive isn't important as well. It isn't just important in the US; it's important everywhere in the world. It's part of our biology. Every day at work I see people wearing outfits that borderline on pajamas. Nobody is going to listen to you long enough to find out how smart you are if you look like you don't give a sh*t. If you want to be heard, you need to comb your hair and put on some pants that aren't made of flannel. I don't think this is too much to ask.
The other thing that got me thinking about this topic is a TV show called "Toddlers & Tiaras". If you haven't seen it, please let me be the first to tell you that it's f*cking awesome. It's a reality show that follows young children (mostly girls, but sometimes boys) who are competing in pageants. While it's true that most of the parents are overzealous, I think it's great that the kids are involved in a competitive activity that they seem to enjoy. I also think it's great that I get to watch the overzealous parents lose their minds over a fake hair piece being misplaced.
I'd just like to point out that it isn't always the physically "cutest" kid who wins the pageant. The winner is usually the kid who has the best attitude and executes all their routines well. How is that different from any other sport or competitive activity available to kids? I have nothing against teaching kids that hard work and dedication usually pays off. Sometimes you work hard and you still don't win. Is that a bad lesson? I think not.
Bring on the fake teeth and sparkly outfits, and afterward, let's all eat celery and watch Jeopardy.
